A lot of my value has been wrapped up in being a strong and independent person. I have learned over the last couple of years to ask for help in some small ways, but when I am really struggling, I dig in and play the “I’m fine”card.
In a couple of days we will move into the second half of 2018. This year has already been a rollercoaster of wonderful blessings and life-altering changes. It has been challenging to hold both realities. These last couple of weeks have been especially tumultuous.
When I have felt like I couldn’t breathe from the grief, my tribe has risen to hold my heart and soothe me with texts, emails, phone calls and visits. I had to laugh as one friend ignored me all together and brought groceries, despite my protests. Just sitting together, laughing and talking brought me so much joy and light. Each check in eases my burden bit by bit.
This wasn’t the summer I had planned for in many ways, but I am doing my best to listen to what I’m receiving. I haven’t been able to be out in the world much, but I’ve had the time to go inward and process my own world and the worlds I am building in a handful of stories.
I’m also learning to let people in more and accept more help. It doesn’t make me less valuable to be vulnerable, despite how uncomfortable it can make me. I know it is just a by-product of my broken heart. I have faith that it’ll be even stronger after it heals.
I was lucky enough to get a link to this incredible artist’s website from one of my best friends this weekend. It couldn’t have come at a better time. I needed all of this advice in a big way. Reading it opened something up in me and I’ve been flooded with inspiration all day. I LOVE his black out newspaper poems. They are brilliant and such a wonderful idea.
Austin tells us ten things that nobody ever told him – some are simple truths, but that doesn’t lessen their impact. Sometimes the simple truths are the things we need reminded of. I especially needed to hear these truths:
Don’t wait until you know who you are to make things – It’s easy to get paralyzed by always waiting until you know more. The reality is that as Austin points out, “It’s in the act of making things that we figure out who we are.”
Write what you like – This is wonderful advice. We’re told as beginning writers to write what we know, but that can be so boring and limiting. We have access to unlimited resources with our imagination, if we’re writing what we like we can bring so much more to the table.
Be boring. It’s the only way to get work done – I really needed to hear this. I build up my to-do lists every day and often try to be too much for too many…at the end of the day it’s hard to get much of my own art done. I’m definitely needing to focus on being boring 🙂
Do yourself a favor and see Austin’s post here. This is too great to keep to myself.