Breathe and Re-boot

The beginning of 2010 has been one of the craziest that I can remember. Between graduate school and an internship, moving, coaching and attempting to work as a substitute teacher as often as I can – I’m exhausted.

I love the school that I’m interning at. Ironically, Goldrick is the elementary school I would have attended if we had stayed downtown. I’m in a wonderful third grade class. I’m learning so much from the teacher and the students, but it’s been hard to juggle everything and keep sane.

That said, I’m finally feeling a little more settled this week and will be working out a new schedule so that won’t have to neglect my other passions – writing and music. I can’t recall the last time I sat down to write and I’m definitely feeling it. It’s so important for my soul and peace of mind. Even if it’s only a sentence. I HAVE TO WRITE EVERYDAY!!! My poor abandoned guitar! I’m feeling that pull again and need to give it my attention. I also need to set a goal for performing. A deadline always helps to keep me in line.

I’ve been on an emotional rollercoaster of sorts. A bi-polar trapeze act of great advancement in some life areas and extreme lows in others. I’m in it and I’m trying to stay present and positive. I think the daily writing will help. This is an opportunity to change this habit of setting myself on the back burner once and for all. I don’t want to struggle any longer. Establishing better boundaries and managing MY time needs to become a priority.

I’m up to the challenge and I will check back in again soon.

P.S. I’m still receiving amazing TCC feedback and I’m so grateful for all the comments!

Thank you again~!

Babies and Comfy Shoes

Today has been a weird day. I’ve been on an emotional roller coaster. I was thinking about my emotional theatrics today right before I started blogging and I realized why I’m extra emotional, but it sucks nonetheless.

I yelled at my brother for no reason. Well there was a reason, but that wasn’t what I originally yelled at him about. I didn’t apologize either. But we don’t always have to apologize when we have emotional breakdowns and the other sibling always seems to understand. I will apologize eventually, but it might get me crying again and it’s best to keep to myself at the moment.

On a happier note, I played with a wonderful one-year-old little girl this morning who smiles and my insides melt a bit. There is just something about babies. The way they hold onto your knees as they steady themselves. I’ve always loved little kids, but that love seems to get deeper as I age. I’m sure this sounds like a clock ticking and maybe it is. I just have some other things to focus on first.

I wrote a couple prologues for TCC this weekend and I am really pleased with one of them. I will run it by my trusted readers this coming week.

I also spent my wad on new comfy shoes for teaching. I wanted to get some Dansco’s, but I can’t afford any right now. These will do in the meantime.

And…I will be working on editing TCC the rest of the day. I also promise that I will sit down and write at least 500 words of The Lost. There it’s out in the universe and now I have to do it!

Books Stuff

Yesterday, I had the day off.  It didn’t really feel like a day off because I was running just about every minute. That said, I got a ton done for the book, which feels really good.

I now have a business bank account, merchant paypal account and I signed off on the brilliant cover that Sharon designed for me. I also paid a bunch of bills and bought the materials for the binding press. I’m having a hard time finding Plexiglass that is thick enough. I thought some local art stores might have some, but no luck.

Late last night, I saw Julie and Julia with my mom and dad. Is there anything that Meryl Streep cannot do? I mean seriously. And Stanley Tucci was divine. I laughed and cried with them. What a wonderful love they shared. It would be interesting to read the letters that Julie mentions in the film – I will have to find them and do that.

I have really been slacking on The Lost. I’m not stuck, but I’m in that spot just over half way through the first draft where I am being courted by another manuscript. The middle is a hard spot. And The Christmas Child is so close to release and I have so much to do…it’s just been too easy to ignore The Lost.

I have to commit to it again, even if I’m only writing 500 words a day. I just have to buckle down and do it. I can’t use my wonderfully chaotic life as an excuse. Note to self – writers must sit down to write…remember?

It’s strange and bittersweet to think about leaving the book store. I know I’ll be in and out, working part-time, but it won’t be the same as being here and having my hands in it everyday. I feel that it’s the right time to move on, but it’s always hard to leave.

I’m finally reading The Celestine Prophecy. I really like it so far. I believe that books pick us when it is the exact right time for us to read them. I’m excited to learn why this book picked me…more on that later!